Caffeine, Because I’m a Mom and I Can’t do Cocaine
I don’t have enough time to do all that needs to be done. I need a 36 hour day, 24 just isn’t enough.
It’s early in the morning and no one is up, not even the baby. I know if I even breathe too loud, the little ones will instantly sense I’m up and get up too. I could take up playing an electric guitar in the morning and my husband and teenagers would sleep right through it. But, the little ones, any sound at all and they are up.
So, I really can’t do anything in the mornings. And, I love it. It’s my time. It’s my time to read, to write, to drink my coffee in a quiet house. The rest of the time, my house is never quiet. In fact, it’s incredibly loud. 2000 square foot of tile and any sound made echoes through the house like it’s a canyon. Four kids and two adults worth of noise echoing through the house makes quite a ruckus.
I am officially a morning person. That’s when my brain works. And my brain slowly but surely disintegrates as the day progresses.
Unfortunately, I have to go to work while my brain is still working. I guess that’s a good thing, since I have a fairly complicated job. By the time I get home from work, my brain is a frazzled mess. I just spend too many hours crunching numbers and putting out fires.
I dream of a “life” remote control that has just one button – pause. If I could just pause everything for a little while and catch up – catch up on sleep, catch up on laundry and, most important, catch up on all the things I want to do that I never have time to do. Like writing about all the great stories and ideas that roll around in my head, but then get forgotten in the hustle and bustle of the day.
But I don’t have a remote control and I can’t change the fact that a day only has 24 hours, so the answer to my dilemma is caffeine. I drink massive amounts of caffeine. I drink coffee, energy drinks, and energy shots.
Yes, I know it’s probably not good for me. But, after working all day, I come home in zombie-mode. I just want to sit, or go to bed, or maybe even eat the children for dinner because my patience is gone. Caffeine fixes that.
One Monster Java, and all is well again. My brain, once again, works. For a little while, anyway. But, there’s dinner, cleaning up from dinner, kids homework, laundry (always laundry), and other assorted things that just have to be done. And, boom, the brain is gone again.
By the time I get the kids in bed, I’m a frazzled brainless mess again. And, unfortunately I can’t drink more caffeine that close to bedtime or I won’t sleep.
So, I really need some really smart nerd out there to invent my pause remote. I can only drink so much caffeine, so it’s really the only way I’m ever going to catch up.